Our U.S. Constitution incorporates a Bill of Rights. Maybe it should also include a Bill of Wrongs!
Americans are entitled to comprehensive health care and full employment, right? Wrong! We are "entitled" to no such things; and the sooner we stop demanding them, the better. That's because the assertion of bogus "entitlements" actually undermines the security of our legitimate rights.
The first ten amendments to the U.S. Constitution guarantee the God-given rights of Americans against the predations of government, but some of our fellow citizens want to increase the power of government so they can expropriate our wealth and restrict our rights. This unfortunate tendency has prompted Representative Mitchell Kaye of Cobb County, Georgia to conclude that our Bill of Rights should be accompanied by a Bill of Wrongs, an official condemnation of the ten most outrageous demands made by our "whiny, guilt-ridden, and delusional" countrymen.
"You do not have the right to a new car, big-screen TV, or any other form of wealth" reads the first amendment in Kaye's Bill of Wrongs. "More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything. You do not have the right to never be offended" reads amendment number two. "This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc., but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be."
Kaye's third amendment asserts that "you do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful; do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and your relatives independently wealthy. You do not have the right to free food and housing," the fourth amendment confirms. "Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes."
Kaye's fifth amendment rejects "the right to free health care." His sixth amendment denies "the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair. You do not have the right to the possessions of others," his seventh amendment asserts. "You do not have the right to demand that our children risk their lives in foreign wars to soothe your aching conscience," says the eighth. "We hate oppressive governments, and won't lift a finger to stop you from going to fight if you'd like. However, we do not enjoy parenting the entire world."
Kaye's ninth and tenth amendments deny "the right to a job" and "the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to pursue happiness," Kaye explains, noting that such pursuit "is a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an over-abundance of idiotic laws."
